Approaching a Writer for Dummies

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Writing On A Vintage Typewriter

A writer is a shy, gentle creature, known for consuming large amounts of chocolate and coffee while working on their novel. They can be male or female, young or old, and come in a variety of different appearances.

At first, you might be tempted to ask them questions about the novel they are working on. If they answer cheerfully, you may continue. If they snap one-word answers, back away slowly and do not make eye contact, or the writer may attack.

At first, the writer may appear to be docile, and might even offer you a chance to read their novel. However if you say anything like A) No offense, but I like (author’s name)’s books better than yours, B) Hey, this is a lot like (insert wildly popular book’s name here)!, C) (Insert friend’s name here) wants to write a novel, maybe you could see if you wants to…

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